Friday, August 9, 2013

South Main Street: Phillipsburg's Finest



Here in Warren County, our human trash collects in one, bedraggled downtown area – South Main and surrounding streets, Phillipsburg or P-burg to the locals. If you meet someone who says they are from that area, you can probably ascertain that they live in Section 8 housing, are of limited intellect, and may also be the product of inbreeding. My impression of downtown P-burg is that drug use is pretty much rampant, and there's a pedophile around every corner. No joke about that. If you go on the NJ Megan's Law list, you'll see scores of kid-touchers, all living in downtown Phillipsburg. People who live in the better parts of Warren County don't really care to speak of this, but it's there, lurking in the shadows.

Now, I'm not saying that *all* South Main residents are druggie trash and/or sex offenders. There may be some respectable, hardworking families living down there. I don't really know, because I avoid the area like the plague. I don't know what scope of that region is truly horrific versus simply some honest, blue collar people who are just trying to live a humble life. But I will say this:

There is a reason why houses in that vicinity currently go for the bargain price of $40,000.00. Yes... a future slumlord's dream come true. The last time we drove through there, we were attempting to find a steakhouse or something, in the commercial part of town. My husband cut down a side street, and within seconds our car was swarmed with the lowest form of humanity... zombie-like, slackjaw individuals lurching toward us, tripping over garbage in the streets, making little effort to get out of the way of our moving vehicle... one guy actually TOUCHED our car as we were going by?? My husband's mood turned foul, and we ended up high-tailing it out of town, settling on the Phillipsburg diner where we were seated at a table next to 12 obese individuals. The food was godawful.

Now don't get me wrong. There are some really lovely parts of Warren County. It's just that downtown P-burg, specifically South Main Street, is not one of them, and you deserve to know that.